Lolcow Plants

Onion Farms had a lolcow animals forum, but what about lolcow plants? Who decided to let them off the hook? Not me, that's for sure. I mean, some plants are openly bisexual, hermaphroditic, and sexually "imperfect" - whatever that's supposed to mean.

I'll start, with the loblolly pine. "Loblolly" is, according to the dictionary, "a loutish or foolish person"; alternately, a "bumpkin." And it grows in the American South, and land owners will put it in "plantations," just like evil antebellum slave owners. And its timber is a major source for the telephone poles that carry the internet lines that bring gay pornography to the homes of untold millions of degenerate Americans. It is, in short, a retard redneck racist whoremonger tree. It's literally the Ethan Ralph of the conifer world. If that's not thread-worthy, I don't know what is.

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Look at the impudent, insouciant way it curls its branches. This fucker knows what it's up to!
 

Dom Cruise

a man deprived of his idenity
A FUCKING LEAF
Maple trees. They're Canadian, are a Canadian symbol, and they come from Canada. Cucknadians even eat maple cum, for God's sake.

Also Rafflesia, aka the corpse flower, named so because it smells like a room full of dilating coomer trannies. As such, the only thing that goes near it is neckbeard flies.


*not counting the other NEET animals who go near that thing, like ants, pigs, cats, treeshrews, etc.
 
Onion Farms had a lolcow animals forum, but what about lolcow plants? Who decided to let them off the hook? Not me, that's for sure. I mean, some plants are openly bisexual, hermaphroditic, and sexually "imperfect" - whatever that's supposed to mean.

I'll start, with the loblolly pine. "Loblolly" is, according to the dictionary, "a loutish or foolish person"; alternately, a "bumpkin." And it grows in the American South, and land owners will put it in "plantations," just like evil antebellum slave owners. And its timber is a major source for the telephone poles that carry the internet lines that bring gay pornography to the homes of untold millions of degenerate Americans. It is, in short, a retard redneck racist whoremonger tree. It's literally the Ethan Ralph of the conifer world. If that's not thread-worthy, I don't know what is.

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Look at the impudent, insouciant way it curls its branches. This fucker knows what it's up to!
Lol what are its pronouns and how does its autistic Sonic recolor OC look like ?
 

Robert Sanvagene

Doing the needful
Blackberries. Spiky assholes that produce a pitiful amount of berries for their size and breed pretty much everywhere that's a bit cold and damp. They're also a cunt of a thing to kill off/pull out of the ground.
 
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